It's On Me: Accept Hard Truths, Discover Your Self, and Change Your Life

A revolutionary guide to identifying self-loss—that feeling of being adrift, disconnected from your true Self—and discovering the freedom that comes from taking responsibility for how we live and who we become, from an existential psychotherapist, USA Today columnist, and Instagram’s popular “Millennial Therapist”

So many of us feel lonely, unfulfilled, or trapped—in our roles and relationships, in cycles of self-sabotage and bad decisions, by our patterns and misguided attempts to feel happy or to feel something. According to existential psychotherapist Sara Kuburic, it doesn’t have to be so difficult. Really.

The answer is found in facing ourselves—whatever version that might be, regardless of whether we like the person we see reflected back to us. It’s about accepting full responsibility for the choices and actions that create our reality. It’s about finally taking ownership of this person we call our “Self.” It’s about realizing that it’s on us to figure out the two most essential questions: “Who am I” and “Why am I here?” and then to live accordingly.

In It’s on Me, Kuburic unpacks “self-loss,” giving us new vocabulary to understand this rarely talked about experience and offers tools she’s used for years to help clients recover. Self-loss becomes apparent when we do not recognize ourselves in our actions, words, or relationships; when we lose sight of who we truly are, and feel the pain and emptiness from performing or observing life, rather than living it. Guiding us through her unique process of self-reflection, acceptance, and discovery, Kuburic proves that we can
• experience but not feel overpowered by our emotions
• establish a healthy connection to our bodies
• set loving boundaries to define ourselves and heal our relationships
• declutter our physical and mental environments to create space for our true Self to thrive
• find meaning and purpose in a seemingly meaningless world

Revelatory and empowering, Kuburic shows how we can stop sleepwalking our way through the lives we don’t want and step into our most vibrant, authentic, and meaningful Self. In doing so, we unlock a deep sense of connection to our innermost being, and to those around us.